Thursday, December 16, 2004
school
You know, I think I may have a mental block against learning in a classroom. I mean, ever since the third grade I can remember hating school, and now that I am in college, nothing has changed. I love to learn, don't get me wrong, I think that learning is a fundamental human nature and whatnot, but the instant I go to school I tune out. I enjoy learning, but for some reason when I sit in that lecture chair, my mind leaves, and I am left counting the lights in the ceiling or wondering when the last time I washed my pants was.
This is finals week. I took a final this morning, and I think I passed. Don't know for sure until the teacher sends it to me, but I think I passed. I know for a fact that I failed my chem class. I might fail my math class. I probably won't turn in my ME project. And you know what? I don't care. I really really really really do care, but I don't. I just don't. I think there might be something wrong with me, but all I know is that since the third grade, I just don't care about school. Mrs. Visco's class.
Ask anyone I work with if I am a good worker. Ask any of my bosses. See if I work, see if I care about working. They will all tell you that I am a diligent worker who gets stuff done before it's assigned. You know why? because it's true. I work well. I just don't school well. As I think back through every class, every teacher, every mentor, they all tell me the same thing. I am an incredibly bright young man with lots of potential, but I just don't apply myself. If only I worked a little bit harder. If only I would choose studying over voluntarilly staring at a blank wall.
And I would, too.
mom and dad, if you for some reason read this, i'm just frustrated.
http://www.deviantart.com/view/13071561/
omg, that's the coolest thing I think I have ever seen. Completely made my day!